The Magical Being called “Friend”
I sat at my desk, ready to pen down words…..words about friendship. Why ? Simply because I think I know pretty much what its about, having experienced it first hand.
Yes, I have been lucky to have basked in this singular experience called Friendship, an experience which actually had a lot to do in the very making of Me.
I was in my 4th standard, a bright student, privileged to belong to one of the renowned schools in town. Was as comfortable with life as a 9 yr old could be with quite a lot of friends to call my own.
Early in the session, I had my first Hospital Admission with the Monster called Asthma striking, and to which I succumbed. Well it was thus a few days when I had to take a leave of absence from school.
On rejoining, the first dreadful thing that confronted me was to cover up the back log and so started hunting for notes.
It was then that I was informed that while I was away we had a new admission in our class. This nice looking tall slim girl too was unto the same quest, needing notes to cover the syllabus till then.
That was when I met Shree and liked her instantly, hopefully she did too.:) so it was decided that we’d exchange notes. I’ll give my previous notes and she’d lend me those of these last 3-4 days. Another welcome thing was that she had shifted to a house just a few streets from mine.
After school, I went to her house for the same. Strangely enough it was a rare occurance because I was quite an introvert and going to friends’ houses wasn’t a regular practice.
Well it was a very sweet experience, both of us a bit awkward, meeting for the first time but being girls it wasn’t difficult…every girl can vouch for that. :)
More than that it must have been the vibes, that struck a cord between us and thence started my magical experience of having a Friend.
We were unbelievably comfortable with each other. It was the era of No Mobile fones, and the way both our families were, sitting and doing nothing but just chatting away on phone was sheer time waste and neither preferred to do that. So, whatever we met was at school.
We sat together in the same bench, studied together, played together and above all,
bak-bak-bak-bak-bak….emptied our minds on each other, so very casually, it became our second nature,
and the topics were….wait-a-minute…Topics ??....oh, of course there weren’t any topics in particular. :) We just spoke our minds about any and everything under the sun, also, special mention here , about Bollywood movies. Whatever movies we saw, either of us, we’d exchange the story as explicitly as possible. :).
Come to think of it, it is so near impossible to find even a single person in today’s times, when you can just think aloud with no inhibitions and without having to think about
‘wo kya kahegi ?’
The saga went on, I do not remember us ever fighting, though we had our shares of differences in opinion. This bond became a strong force helping us through our innocent lives making all problems seem insignificant in the face of a huge psychological security. This is what I realize now, then, it was something as normal and natural as having our Parents for us.
Even as we were midway our middle school, it was clear which high school we’d go, after 8th, though again it was predecided that she’d persue Maths and me Biology, she for IIT and me for PMT.
Now when I see this era of net and mobile fones connecting people so effectively, utterly shaming 'Distance' which has nearly become a non entity…if only we had these back then.
But these plain waters of peace were wriggled with turbulent waves, with the information that her Papa had decided to put her into DPS – a branch of which was starting its first session then. So we went there on Day-1 of the first batch of 9th std.
To our shock and dismay they had single seating arrangement, wherein we had to sit singly. How I laugh when I remember now, because at that time it was nothing less than the very end of life, not being able to talk to each other except in intervals. :))).
That hell of a day ended finally and we rushed back to our old school HSS X with a Big sigh of relief, never to look back :).
But as we say, Man proposes- God disposes, our happiness was short-lived. It bombed on us that her papa was transferred to Durgapur and sh’d leave after 9th. We sat sad and helpless.
Seemingly within no time, she was gone….just like that. It was impossible to think we’d never be able to see each other or talk to each other…
If it wasn’t for our families, it wouldn’t have been possible for us to take it all.
Indian postal services came to our rescue, and we started posting Inland Letters to each other. The moment one would get one, the same day one inland wud be posted back. We filled each and every corner of the writable space of the inland and again had a special slot for Bollywood here too :)
Time passed but couldn’t blurr our friendship.
It went on till 12th std, after we which started with our respective chosen Colleges, she into Engineering, and I into Medical….we even shared a couple of snaps, but as is obvious, the letters became less frequent as our lives took a whirlwind change with the metamorphosis into college life.
The letters became still infrequent after our marriages and settling in very different cities…
There was no contact for 6-7 yrs hence, while we were moulding and building our respective worlds…
Me being a medical person with a private setup had a cocooned and self sufficient life going for me, thus had neither the need nor inclination towards the world of www or net and the computers were used only for technical purposes.
One fine day, I got a call from one of my sweet school-mates [no not Shree]….and talking to her after a long span of 18-20 yrs was an exhilarating feeling. She informed me that they had an online school group running, that I should join, so that I can reconnect with my classmates once again.
This event got a sudden spark of hope into me, that I could reconnect with Shree too. That much was enough. I was in the know, the enormity and vastness of the range net had. So as soon as I could, I opened an e-mail account and joined the aforementioned group. Yes I did get to reconnect with childhood friends. But no Shree….oh I wasn’t disappointed at all. If I could reach thus far, I was sure to go further and my hopes only rose by the day, of finding Shree, as I saw the present pictures of friends happily settled in India and abroad with spouses and kids….
Days turned to months that in turn converted to yrs, and then the fateful day arrived when I came very near to finding out the whereabouts of Shree, when this selfsame mutual friend [God bless her] told me she had found a person who was known to one of Shree’s relatives. So she promised me she’d get back to me the next morning and give me the contact address or number on which I would be able to contact her directly.
That night was spent with difficulty. More so because the very next day was Shree’s Birthday !! I was now one hundred percent sure, I’d be able to directly wish her 'Happy Birthday' just like old times.
Oh what a feeling that would be…to talk to her again. Maybe i’d go and meet her wherever she was settled. I hoped she was in India itself. I thought I’d just choke with emotion on hearing her voice and won’t be able to talk atall, maybe crying or maybe laughing in delight…I knew not.
That fateful morning came, and with it came the call of our friend as promised…..
the words from the other end, that hit me hard were,
“Shruti, we are one month late !!”
…….what?? what did I hear ?? what did that mean ?? I asked her again and again, what do you mean ??
She clarified….we had lost her in a road accident just one month back, when she was fatally hit by a bus while crossing the road !!
Shree was no more…..!!
no more ?? how ?? there must’ve been some mistake….it couldn’t be !!….it just couldn’t be…..
And then I was filled with remorse….
if only I had tried harder !!…
if only I hadn’t lost touch !!…..if only….
I remember the words of Kahlil Gibran,
“Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.”
Who better than me could feel this then…..
What we shared, was an experience unique in itself…
I lost her….but remained, her memories….with me….in me….she was and will always be….in Me….till my last breath……
The only thing that I learnt was….
The Magical Being called a Friend is Rare !!
Frienship is Precious….cherish it…..savour it…help it grow…
…do not take it for granted…..life may not give you a second chance...
….do not let go…..Live it when u have it….
its not worth losing…...............Ever…..
-Shruti
I sat at my desk, ready to pen down words…..words about friendship. Why ? Simply because I think I know pretty much what its about, having experienced it first hand.
Yes, I have been lucky to have basked in this singular experience called Friendship, an experience which actually had a lot to do in the very making of Me.
I was in my 4th standard, a bright student, privileged to belong to one of the renowned schools in town. Was as comfortable with life as a 9 yr old could be with quite a lot of friends to call my own.
Early in the session, I had my first Hospital Admission with the Monster called Asthma striking, and to which I succumbed. Well it was thus a few days when I had to take a leave of absence from school.
On rejoining, the first dreadful thing that confronted me was to cover up the back log and so started hunting for notes.
It was then that I was informed that while I was away we had a new admission in our class. This nice looking tall slim girl too was unto the same quest, needing notes to cover the syllabus till then.
That was when I met Shree and liked her instantly, hopefully she did too.:) so it was decided that we’d exchange notes. I’ll give my previous notes and she’d lend me those of these last 3-4 days. Another welcome thing was that she had shifted to a house just a few streets from mine.
After school, I went to her house for the same. Strangely enough it was a rare occurance because I was quite an introvert and going to friends’ houses wasn’t a regular practice.
Well it was a very sweet experience, both of us a bit awkward, meeting for the first time but being girls it wasn’t difficult…every girl can vouch for that. :)
More than that it must have been the vibes, that struck a cord between us and thence started my magical experience of having a Friend.
We were unbelievably comfortable with each other. It was the era of No Mobile fones, and the way both our families were, sitting and doing nothing but just chatting away on phone was sheer time waste and neither preferred to do that. So, whatever we met was at school.
We sat together in the same bench, studied together, played together and above all,
bak-bak-bak-bak-bak….emptied our minds on each other, so very casually, it became our second nature,
and the topics were….wait-a-minute…Topics ??....oh, of course there weren’t any topics in particular. :) We just spoke our minds about any and everything under the sun, also, special mention here , about Bollywood movies. Whatever movies we saw, either of us, we’d exchange the story as explicitly as possible. :).
Come to think of it, it is so near impossible to find even a single person in today’s times, when you can just think aloud with no inhibitions and without having to think about
‘wo kya kahegi ?’
The saga went on, I do not remember us ever fighting, though we had our shares of differences in opinion. This bond became a strong force helping us through our innocent lives making all problems seem insignificant in the face of a huge psychological security. This is what I realize now, then, it was something as normal and natural as having our Parents for us.
Even as we were midway our middle school, it was clear which high school we’d go, after 8th, though again it was predecided that she’d persue Maths and me Biology, she for IIT and me for PMT.
Now when I see this era of net and mobile fones connecting people so effectively, utterly shaming 'Distance' which has nearly become a non entity…if only we had these back then.
But these plain waters of peace were wriggled with turbulent waves, with the information that her Papa had decided to put her into DPS – a branch of which was starting its first session then. So we went there on Day-1 of the first batch of 9th std.
To our shock and dismay they had single seating arrangement, wherein we had to sit singly. How I laugh when I remember now, because at that time it was nothing less than the very end of life, not being able to talk to each other except in intervals. :))).
That hell of a day ended finally and we rushed back to our old school HSS X with a Big sigh of relief, never to look back :).
But as we say, Man proposes- God disposes, our happiness was short-lived. It bombed on us that her papa was transferred to Durgapur and sh’d leave after 9th. We sat sad and helpless.
Seemingly within no time, she was gone….just like that. It was impossible to think we’d never be able to see each other or talk to each other…
If it wasn’t for our families, it wouldn’t have been possible for us to take it all.
Indian postal services came to our rescue, and we started posting Inland Letters to each other. The moment one would get one, the same day one inland wud be posted back. We filled each and every corner of the writable space of the inland and again had a special slot for Bollywood here too :)
Time passed but couldn’t blurr our friendship.
It went on till 12th std, after we which started with our respective chosen Colleges, she into Engineering, and I into Medical….we even shared a couple of snaps, but as is obvious, the letters became less frequent as our lives took a whirlwind change with the metamorphosis into college life.
The letters became still infrequent after our marriages and settling in very different cities…
There was no contact for 6-7 yrs hence, while we were moulding and building our respective worlds…
Me being a medical person with a private setup had a cocooned and self sufficient life going for me, thus had neither the need nor inclination towards the world of www or net and the computers were used only for technical purposes.
One fine day, I got a call from one of my sweet school-mates [no not Shree]….and talking to her after a long span of 18-20 yrs was an exhilarating feeling. She informed me that they had an online school group running, that I should join, so that I can reconnect with my classmates once again.
This event got a sudden spark of hope into me, that I could reconnect with Shree too. That much was enough. I was in the know, the enormity and vastness of the range net had. So as soon as I could, I opened an e-mail account and joined the aforementioned group. Yes I did get to reconnect with childhood friends. But no Shree….oh I wasn’t disappointed at all. If I could reach thus far, I was sure to go further and my hopes only rose by the day, of finding Shree, as I saw the present pictures of friends happily settled in India and abroad with spouses and kids….
Days turned to months that in turn converted to yrs, and then the fateful day arrived when I came very near to finding out the whereabouts of Shree, when this selfsame mutual friend [God bless her] told me she had found a person who was known to one of Shree’s relatives. So she promised me she’d get back to me the next morning and give me the contact address or number on which I would be able to contact her directly.
That night was spent with difficulty. More so because the very next day was Shree’s Birthday !! I was now one hundred percent sure, I’d be able to directly wish her 'Happy Birthday' just like old times.
Oh what a feeling that would be…to talk to her again. Maybe i’d go and meet her wherever she was settled. I hoped she was in India itself. I thought I’d just choke with emotion on hearing her voice and won’t be able to talk atall, maybe crying or maybe laughing in delight…I knew not.
That fateful morning came, and with it came the call of our friend as promised…..
the words from the other end, that hit me hard were,
“Shruti, we are one month late !!”
…….what?? what did I hear ?? what did that mean ?? I asked her again and again, what do you mean ??
She clarified….we had lost her in a road accident just one month back, when she was fatally hit by a bus while crossing the road !!
Shree was no more…..!!
no more ?? how ?? there must’ve been some mistake….it couldn’t be !!….it just couldn’t be…..
And then I was filled with remorse….
if only I had tried harder !!…
if only I hadn’t lost touch !!…..if only….
I remember the words of Kahlil Gibran,
“Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.”
Who better than me could feel this then…..
What we shared, was an experience unique in itself…
I lost her….but remained, her memories….with me….in me….she was and will always be….in Me….till my last breath……
The only thing that I learnt was….
The Magical Being called a Friend is Rare !!
Frienship is Precious….cherish it…..savour it…help it grow…
…do not take it for granted…..life may not give you a second chance...
….do not let go…..Live it when u have it….
its not worth losing…...............Ever…..
-Shruti
Wonderfully expressed-the anguish of losing someone who is integral to one's "being" is extremely difficult to deal with.The ifs & buts plague us forever but then on the positive side,thankfully the beauty of the relationship,the depth of feelings that have embedded themselves in our hearts,helps mask the pain & tide over it so that we can go forward with life.A friend is forever-whether he/she is near or far-here or up there-long live friendship!
ReplyDeleteThank you Atreyee di. agreed with what you say, yet some scars never heal.....
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